Went out early in the morning to go and pray to mum at gong ming shan.. Boy kor kor sent us there.. So many ppl were there to pray to their loved ones... Whole place is filled with incense smoke.. My eyes will tear whenever i walk pass the offerings.. However, I feel happy that ppl still remember to pray to their ancestors, this shows that the chinese culture is still in the roots but i wonder how long will this custom last... I dun tink it'll last for too long.. TO me, it's always important for the young to remember their ancestors.. But, that rememberance is fading...
After that we went to visit auntie(mum's sister)... She aged a lot.. No longer the chirpy auntie i knew.. She stays alone in a 4 room flat.. Such a big flat but such a lonely old lady.. I have no idea why she refuses to stay with my cousins.. BUt that's her choice.. She pulled me to 1 side before i left and asked me if dad's still staying with me.. She cried when she said that she can't even go and pay her respects to mum on qing ming and on her death anniversary.. I told her that mum will understand that.. She dreamt of mum a few days back but she had already forgotten wat she dreamt about.. I can feel her sadness.. She really wished to join mum.. I know that.. I wished too... But i CAn't.. At least not when my dad is still ard.. She blamed me for not visiting her often.. I really dun know wat to say.. Am i escaping? escaping from that face that resembles mum or am i too lazy to do so?? I think i am jus too lazy.. Busy is jus an excuse i give myself and to her...
Time flies.. Tomorrow is mum death anniversary.. It has been 2 years.. But i cant go and pray to her as i am in school...
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